Skip to main content

This Recently Married Man Just Realized Marriage Is Not For Him. You Have To Read What He Wrote.

Sup Travellers?! Seth Adam Smith was married to his wife Kim for a year and a half before deciding that marriage was just not for him. Now before you judge him for being inconsiderate I recommend that you read the note he wrote:


Having been married only a year and a half, I've recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn't for me.

Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.

I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends. :) I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?

Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.

Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.

My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn't for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn't for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”

It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.


My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn't make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.

No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”

Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.

But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and anguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.

I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.

To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.

And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.

Truly, love and marriage isn't for you. It’s for others.

Do you agree with him? Disagree?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Groom Cancels Wedding After Seeing Video Of Bride Going Wild In Bachelorette Party.

Bachelor and Bachelorette parties are usually pretty wild and certain levels of craziness are expected and tolerated. But there is an unspoken limit to the amount of fun that you can actually have. One woman, however, clearly is unaware of these limits because she took her bachelorette party to a whole new level and it all surfaced online.
The woman got a little too "personal" with a stripper. And after some alleged "hacking" the video got sent to the groom and as you can expect, he wasn't too happy about it. 
The woman was literally banged by the stripper (like full penetration). I mean, a little dance might have been forgivable but not a full on banging. 
Like really? 
Obviously, the groom called off the wedding after seeing the video.

The video was then uploaded by a certain Carmelo Delva and went viral on social media. Now, the video gets very lewd and I'm pretty sure it's been deleted by Facebook now but it begs the question --- was the groom righ…

23 Child Actors From Horror Films You Won’t Recognize Today

23. John Franklin: Children of the Corn, 1984

© 21cf   © jfranklinactor  
John Franklin played the pivotal role of Issac Chroner in the film adaptation of Stephen King's novel, "Children of the Corn". Since the movie he hasn't played any major movie roles and became an English teacher. But in 2015 he quit his job and decided to act again.
22. Lindsey Haun: Village of the Damned, 1995

© theofficialjohncarpenter  
Lindsey Haun played the Children's leader, Mara Chaffee in Village Of The Damned. Today she still acts in movies and composes her own soundtracks.
21. Daveigh Chase: The Ring, 2002


© dreamworkspictures   © depositphotos  
The Ring, one of the creepiest horror films of this generation starred Daviegh Chase who played the role of Samara Morgan. Today, her acting career is still pretty solid. She voices cartoon characters and sings. She also rides in her spare times.
20. Linda Blair: The Exorcist, 1973

© eastnews   © wikimedia  
Linda Blair's role in "…

VIDEO: Dad Abandons Little Girl On Dirt Road, Then He Looks Into The Rear View Mirror

Adoption is one of the kindest things things you can do as human and I have enormous respect for anyone who does it. It's usually a spark of enthusiasm that causes a family to adopt someone into their home but for some, that spark of enthusiasm doesn't last very long and becomes dim. When things get hard, and the responsibilities kick in, remembering why you adopted in the first place becomes more and more fuzzy.

The short video below is a perfect depiction of what happens when the spark dissipates. In the video we see a family adopting a little girl from an orphanage. At first they are super excited to have a new addition to their family but eventually their excitement wears off and quickly turns to annoyance.

When it gets to be too much, the father packs the little girl into the car with her favorite toy and starts off towards an empty dirt road. The father stops the car on the side of the road and throws the girl's toy far from the car. As she runs after her toy, Dad q…